There is no grey area between being courageous and being a coward
As the great band Midlake once sang, “I could never find the courage of others.” Thoughts about this often rings true and becomes more of a theme in my observations on life. It takes courage and bravery to do many things. Music included. The vigor and the audacity to just merely fail. It fuels our willingness to carry on and to try.
In my travels, courage is really apparent in people you come across. It also is a fuel when you meet someone who also has courage. Even for a brief moment, when our paths crossed. It almost feels like the flame burning inside of you becomes engulfed. Oh what a joy that it brings when you do. Albeit rarely.
I can not tell you how I acquired courage in my life. I know I lacked it a lot when I was a young boy growing up in the UK. But I believe that this is just the natural order. A part of growing up. One simply cannot just learn courage and apply it right off the bat. I know I certainly lacked the self esteem and tenacity to do anything. If it is talking to people or if it is trying to grasp the concept of anything, especially in an alien culture. I knew that my parents did not teach me anything about courage. Perhaps it was the Thai culture or the distance from them not being around so much. I am not delegating blame here. They are great parents still to this day. In many other ways they have given me everything I wanted. I think that I found courage when times were truly the hardest. When you question your existence or when you are down in the dumps. Filling our minds with doubts. I realised though, if I did not try and fail in every way musically, emotionally or socially. I probably would not be a person with courage. I once did read a book that touched on courage and I remember the technique the book told me to do. When ever I needed courage. That is to envision the moment in my life when you had the sheer strength and fortitude, to make that a point of reference. Then I would close my eyes and rub my index finger with my thumb in a circular motion. For me the moment I remembered was when I was 13, living in the South of England, on a rugby field. Playing as a second row against another school. I remembered parents and teachers scantily littered on the side lines watching us. Cheering us on. Distinctively, what I recollect now from that memory was Mr Phillips, our school headmaster. His voice carrying across the open fields. Giving his kids some support with his searing voice. In some spur of the moment, or maybe it was a rush of blood through the head. The rugby ball was in sight. Without hesitation, I grabbed the ball laying underneath the scrum and out maneuvered four or five opponent in the ruck and just ran 50 meters from where the rugby post was and scored a try. I didn’t use the finger and thumb method for sometime as I was growing up. But it would have been certainly useful during my teenage phase.
Courage is a kind of theme that is touched on Brave Face. One must put on a brave face ever so often. Like meeting an ex or someone whom you drifted apart for unforeseen amount of time. The emotional trade winds that one goes through. When I encountered young people. Here or abroad, I often cannot help but to think about them and courage. What it means to them. Some of course have it. Because the sheer drop life can render. But I sometimes feel that courage is lacking in many young minds, just like me in the younger days. Whether if its parenting or culture or social media or by the means of natural order. I just hope that as many people would be wiling acquire courage in their own ways and means. Try your best and fail often. Then we can be a force for good and reach for our dreams. As courage also inspires others and often we should sacrifice a bit of ourselves for others.
